The Last Superhero
by Fictionstv
Summary: Parody of CW Supergirl, Star Wars The Last Jedi, and Man of Steel mixed together. Alex recklessly attacks the world engine, Kara seeks the guidance of Superman, Lena and James go on a quest to find master code-breaker, Winn, while Zod and Faora try to conquer the world.


**The Last Superhero**

(An Adventures Production)

* * *

Zod's massive ship descended upon Metropolis, its three-pronged legs shattering buildings as it came down. The legs pierced through the streets finally stopping deep underground. The Kryptonian criminals watched out the windows and saw Metropolis in a state of evacuation. Emergency responders were quickly on the scene working to move the injured and direct people away from the city.

"It would appear the city is in the process of evacuation," Jax said amused.

"It won't matter. Soon, the entire planet will be terraformed to look like Krypton. No human will survive the process," Zod said coldly.

"Our world engine on the other side of the planet has landed and is now slaved to us," Faora reported.

"Excellent. Begin the pulse," Zod ordered.

The twin world engines suddenly fired into the ground. Metropolis buildings immediately shattered and started to fall apart near the world engine buckling under the stress. The streets and anything close to the pulse was incinerated as it went through the crust towards the interior of the planet. The Indian Ocean world engine similarly pulsed into the island it had landed on creating tsunami waves.

"Enemy human aircraft approaching," Faora said referring to a lone US fighter jet.

Alex went straight for the world engine alone directly on top of it going into a dive. "Agent Davers, this dive is suicide," Hank told her.

"Thanks for your support, Director," Alex said dismissively and continued her dive towards the world engine.

"Human aircraft use primitive combustion missiles. The pulse will dag them to the ground harmlessly," Jax said confidently.

"But the aircraft is not firing from the side but from directly above," Faora noted looking up.

"Scramble fighters!" Zod shouted seeing the danger.

Alex fired all of her missiles directly on top of world engine. The missiles hit creating massive explosions on the ship's hull and blasting out the windows of the command center. Alex then worked to pull up to escape the flames she had created. The fighter pulled up in time staying clear of the pulse beam.

"We have a hit! Did you see that?" Hank asked US Air Force command.

"Roger that. Good shooting. Ready to engage," the US Air Force squadron leader replied via radio.

US fighters approached in the same exact way as Alex firing missiles down on the world engine. The majority of the missiles hit the ship with occasionally a few being sent the ground by the pulse beam. The fighters then pulled up before the pulse beam could pull them to the ground.

Kryptonian beetle ships left the world engine and went after the fighters. A dogfight ensued in the city with fighters being blasted out of the sky or crashing into buildings. Metropolis had become a war-zone. "You did your duty. Now get the hell out of there," Hank ordered Alex.

"I still have bullets," Alex protested.

A Kryptonian ship chased after Alex firing plasma bursts into the city. Alex maneuvered her fighter the best she could but got hit. "I'm hit!" she said and then pulled her ejector lever escaping the burning fighter. It crashed in the middle of the city as Alex lifted up in a parachute. US fighters and Kryptonian ships fired on each other blasting each other to scrap. Still, the US fighters were more numerous gaining air superiority.

"We've lost our fighters," Faora reported.

"The world engine has suffered catastrophic damage. We must evacuate," Jax said as the world engine's pulse beam went offline.

Zod gave a furious look as he considered his options. "Abandon ship," he ordered.

The Kryptonian criminals jumped out of the world engine as it exploded and collapsed in the middle of Metropolis. Still not able to fly yet, the Kryptonians used super-speed to retreat out of the city towards the world engine on the Indian Ocean.

Alex smiled victoriously as the world engine collapsed before her very eyes ending the Battle of Metropolis and saving the planet from doom. Hank and his fellow DEO personal cheered at their success. "Good work, everyone," he complimented.

* * *

Kara as Supergirl approached Superman at his Fortress of Solitude in the Arctic. He had long wavy hair and a beard like he hadn't shaved in a year. He gave her a somber look as Kara approached him. She reached out to him with a Kryptonite crystal she had spent so long and hard to recover that contained all the secrets of the universe if only unlocked by the right person, a true hero. Superman took the crystal from her, looked it over briefly, and then flung it over his shoulder. He then walked away from her.

"The fuck?" Kara wondered and chased after him.

Kara found Superman going into his personal chambers and then closing the door behind him. "Kal-El, I'm from the government and I'm here to help."

"Go away," Superman told her.

"Alright, I'm done with this bullshit," Kara said as she kicked the door in. "You're coming back with me."

"How did you find me?" Superman asked.

"James Olsen betrayed your trust and told me exactly where this fortress was the moment I asked him about it. He even showed me where the key was," Kara answered.

"James Olsen?" he wondered. "Wait...where's Lois?"

"The bad news is that Faora killed Lois with heat vision. The good news is that I kicked her ass for it," Kara replied.

* * *

The Kryptonians quickly took refuge in the second world engine in the Indian Ocean. Faora came to meet Zod on his new throne. She knelt before Zod a distance away from his throne. "How's your wound?" Zod asked her referring to when Kara blasted her face with heat vision.

"It's nothing," Faora replied.

"The mighty Faora-Ul," he mocked. "When I found you, I saw what all generals wish to see: raw, untamed, power. And beyond that, something truly special: the potential of your bloodline. Now, I fear I was mistaken," Zod said disappointed.

"I've given everything I have to you," Faora said defensively.

"You were unbalanced, bested by a girl that had never been trained. You failed!" Zod shouted at her.

Faora went for a strike only for Zod to blast her back with heat vision. "Kal-El lives! The seed of the House of El lives. As long as he does, the humans still have hope. I thought you would be the one to snuff it out. Alas, you're no officer. Just a child," Zod insulted.

Faora stormed out humiliated and pissed-off ready to prove herself in the next engagement.

* * *

Kara looked over Superman as he moped about. "The Kryptonian criminals are assholes. They're only getting stronger with time. They will control all the major nations within days. We need your help. We need the Justice League back. We need Superman."

"You don't need Superman," he replied.

"Did you hear a fucking word I just said?" Kara asked annoyed.

"You think what? That I'm going to waltz right over to Zod and his minions and defeat them all with my laser eyes?" Superman mocked.

"Yeah," Kara said obviously.

"What did you think you were going to find here?" Superman asked.

"I don't know, dignity, self-respect, loyalty towards comrades, compassion for the people of the Earth," Kara listed off.

"Do you think I went to the most unfindable place on Earth for no reason at all?" Superman asked.

"Well, yeah, because you gave James a fucking map to find your ass if we ever needed you," Kara said incredulously.

"Go away," Superman repeated and went back to his room.

"I'm not leaving without you, asshole," Kara called after him.

* * *

Unable to convince him to leave, Kara looked around the fortress and started looking up archived information on the computer. "Why are you here, Kara?" Superman asked.

"I thought I made myself abundantly clear. The DEO sent me," Kara said impatiently.

"But why are _you_ here?" Superman questioned.

"To kick ass and take names," Kara said obviously.

"You need a teacher," Superman figured.

"Yeah, sure," Kara said not taking him seriously.

"I can't teach you," Superman said turning away.

"Well, why the fuck not?" Kara asked frustrated. "It's not like you're busy. All you do is drink, catch fish, and watch old movies."

"I will never train another superhero again," Superman said resolved. "I came to this fortress to die. It's time for superheroes to end."

* * *

Alex reported into the DEO and met up with Hank. "You disobeyed an order and lost an expensive piece of hardware but that was bad-ass," Hank complimented. "You're promoted to my executive officer."

The rest of the DEO clapped for her. Alex smiled pleased by the reception. James walked unsteadily towards Alex. "How are you doing? Faora cooked your back pretty well," Alex said to him.

"It'll take more than that to take down James Olsen," James smiled. "Where's Supergirl?"

"Off trying to find Superman. We're going to need him if we hope to win this fight," Hank said seriously.

"So, what's the plan until she comes back?" James asked.

"We're assembling a world-wide strike team to take down the world engine in the Indian Ocean. However, if Smallville is any indication, there's nothing short of a nuke that can take down these Kryptonians," Hank said grimly.

"Three incoming bogies," Alex reported urgently.

"No," Hank realized.

Faora and two Kryptonians smashed through the DEO glass doors and gave DEO personal a beat down as they went further inside. Hank became J'onn and fought Faora one-on-one while the other two trashed the DEO. Faora used her martial arts skills on J'onn but her attacks merely went through him. Realizing what he was, Faora blasted the floor with heat vision creating fires everywhere. J'onn looked around apprehensively at the fire. Faora then took hold of J'onn and threw him outside the building where he fell to the street below.

Green lights then came on weakening the Kryptonians. Alex and James fired their laser pistols dropping two of the Kryptonians and then went for the struggling Faora. Seeing the danger she was in, Faora retreated from the DEO running out the doors and jumping off the ledge. Regaining her power, she then flew away.

Alex quickly took the elevator and found Hank unmoving in a crater of his own making. "Thank God you're alive," Alex said looking over his prone body.

* * *

Superman brooded as Kelex, the droid, floated near him. "Kelex?"

"Kal-El, criminals from Krypton have arrived on Earth, threatening the existence of the human race," he said.

"I know," Superman nodded.

"So, get off your ass and do something," Kelex lectured.

"Hey, watch the language," Superman scolded. "Old friend, I wish I could make you understand. I'm not coming back. Nothing can make me change my mind."

Kelex then showed a hologram of Jor-El's face. "They can be a great people, Kal-El, if they wish to be. They only need a light to show them the way."

"That's a dirty trick," Superman scowled.

He then went to go find Kara who was taking a nap next to several liquor bottles. "At dawn," Superman told her.

"Wait...we're on the North Pole. It's always sunny," Kara said confused.

"Three lessons: I will teach you the ways of the superhero and why they need to end," Superman told her.

"Fuck it. I'll take what I can get," Kara muttered and went back to sleep.

* * *

Alex came forth to address the men at the DEO. "Our director is unconscious but recovering. The chain of command is clear. It is...,"

"I will be taking over the DEO from now on," Lucy Lane said in her Army ASU uniform.

"Wait...what?" Alex asked incredulously.

"It's a presidential order. The US Army is now taking over the DEO while this crisis is ongoing," Lucy said smugly.

Alex looked at the paper detailing the order with dismay. "At this moment, all Kryptonians including Superman and Supergirl are enemies of the state. Finding them will be our top priority."

"Excuse me, Superman and Supergirl are on our side," Alex said obviously.

"Agent Danvers, is it? You're responsible for the destruction of a few dozen of our best-trained pilots and fighter jets," Lucy scolded.

"I led a strike that down a world engine, so you can go fuck yourself," Alex shot back.

"I've dealt with plenty of trigger-happy people just like you. I prosecuted their ass as a JAG officer. Just like them, you're impulsive, dangerous, and the last thing we need right now. So, either you will be at your desk or in a detention cell," Lucy told her.

* * *

James met up with Lena at L Tower. The building had been evacuated except for Lena who was still at her desk. "Thank God you're still alive," Lena embraced James.

"It was a close call," James nodded.

"We have a situation here. The world engine is sending a signal into deep space. We don't know where it's going but it could be reinforcements. We need to find a way to stop that signal," Alex said from a video screen in the office.

"So, we blow it up," James smiled.

"I like where your heads at, but it won't be that easy," Lena said and then turned on another TV monitor. It showed Indian fighters being destroyed by spider-looking arms coming out the world engine destroying incoming missiles before they could hit the ship.

"Exactly. The Indian military tried to hit them from every direction without result. A nuclear strike is being contemplated but the nuclear fallout would be catastrophic for the environment," Alex said.

"So, what do we suggest we do?" Lena asked.

"I know an excellent hacker named Winn Schott Jr. Get him inside the world engine and he can shut down that signal from the inside," Alex suggested.

"Where can we find him?" James asked.

"The last place I heard, it was Las Vegas," Alex replied.

"I'll get my jet ready," Lena said determinedly.

* * *

Kara dreamed of her vicious fight with Faora. As she awoke, she fired heat vision through the wall and into the open air. "What's that about?" Superman asked.

"I was rubbing my eyes and they went off," Kara said sheepishly.

"Let's get started," Superman grumbled.

Kelex immediately went to work to patch up the hole. Superman brought Kara to a high Arctic mountain. "We need you to come back. Zod and Faora are evil. We won't stand a chance without you," Kara said.

"What do you know of evil?" Superman asked her.

"It's a power that controls people and makes things float," Kara said.

"Impressive," Superman replied.

"I know, right?" Kara said, proud of herself.

"Every word in that sentence was wrong," he shut her down.

"Well, a sadistic clown monster would disagree," Kara said defensively.

"Lesson one: sit here legs crossed," Superman instructed.

Kara reluctantly did so playing along. "Good and evil is not a power you have. It's not about lifting rocks. It's the energy between all things, the tension, the balance that binds the universe together," Superman said.

"If you say so," Kara said not taking him seriously. "But what is it?"

"Close your eyes, breathe, and reach out," Superman instructed.

Kara reached out with her hand instead of her mind. Superman gave her an annoyed look and put an icicle in her hand. "Oh, I felt something!" Kara said excitedly.

"Do you feel it?" Superman asked.

"I do, holy shit!" Kara said amazed.

"That's good and evil," Superman told her.

"Really?" Kara wondered.

Superman then slapped her hand breaking the icicle. "You meant to reach out this way," Kara realized tapping her chest. "I mean, my heart, not my boobs," Kara clarified for him. "I'll try again."

Kara closed her eyes and meditated. "Breathe, just breathe," Superman told her. "Reach out with your feelings. What do you see?"

"Energy in the air, the ocean, the mountains, and even the snow," Kara said sensing it all.

"And inside you?" Superman asked her.

"I see power beyond reason or comprehension with a depth far greater than any ocean wider than any horizon," Kara said impressed with herself.

"So, you see the light doesn't belong to superheroes. It belongs to everyone. To say otherwise is vanity," Superman said.

"That's such a strawman. No one is saying civilians can't be a force for good," Kara argued. "And I sense something else. I sense very little coming from you. What the fuck? Did you strip yourself of your powers?"

"You instinctively went to the darkness. You didn't even try to stop yourself," Superman said aghast. "You violated my privacy and turned to the Darkside."

"Drama queen, much?" Kara mocked. "You came here and stripped yourself of your powers. Why the fuck am I even here?"

"I've seen this raw strength only once before. It didn't scare me back then. It does now," Superman said wide-eyed.

"Well...finally some respect," Kara smiled.

Superman then walked back to to the fortress leaving her behind.

* * *

At Las Vegas, James was thrilled back in his comfort zone enjoying the sights and sounds of a casino. "Come on, James. We have a job to do," Lena pulled him away from a random stripper.

The two finally found Winn playing poker and winning a large stack. "Winn Schott?" Lena asked.

"Who's asking?" he asked apprehensively.

"My name is Lena Luthor. I'm kind of a big deal. You may have heard of me," Lena replied.

"I'm not a fan of the Luthors," Winn said snidely.

"Hey, I'm Superman's best buddy. How about you help us out save the world," James said sitting to his other side.

"How can I possibly help save the world?" Winn asked.

"We need you to enter an alien ship and hack it from the inside. Can you do that for us?" Lena asked.

"Fuck no. That sounds dangerous," Winn refused.

"Look, I didn't want to pull this card but the world needs you. If we get out of this alive, you can suck my dick," James offered.

"I'm not gay," Winn said defensively.

"I can give you a shitload of money," Lena offered.

"All I've ever wanted was to a nice evening with Supergirl," Winn said dreamily.

"We can make that happen. I'm best friends with her," Lena lied.

"Deal," Winn agreed.

"Alright, let's get moving because this subplot right here is complete ass," James said urgently.

* * *

In the Arctic, Kara blasted a rock formation to nothing with her heat vision. She saw Superman watching her and then walking away. "Now that they're extinct, superheroes are romanticized, deified. Strip away their myths and look at their deeds their legacy is a failure," Superman said.

"Preaching to the choir," Kara agreed.

"Hypocrisy, hubris, at the height of their power they allowed Batman and Robin to happen," Superman said bitterly.

"That's fair," Kara nodded. "But you brought superheroes back from the abyss with Superman Returns," Kara lied.

Superman shook his head at that. "I was once a legend and for many years there was balance and then I saw flop-after-flop and failed starts."

"You are not a failure. You had ten years of television where we watched you grow up and become the man you are today. There are cartoons of you over the last two decades. Comics of you are still in print. You don't need blockbuster hits to be relevant," Kara told him.

"Easy for you to say, Kara. Your show is going strong," Superman shook his head.

"The fuck you talking about. I'm on the verge of being canceled. I get the highest ratings when you are with me. There's even talk of you replacing me. I'm not the star. You are," Kara told him.

"I've killed people, had a bastard son, was a deadbeat dad, and even died. What a legend I turned out to be," Superman said filled with self-pity.

"The world needs a legend. I need someone to show me my place in all this shit and you didn't fail the world, the studios did," Kara told him.

"Nah, I'm done, really. Time for someone else to take up the cape," Superman replied.

"You son-of-a-bitch," Kara said punching Superman off a mountain. He fell in the snow dazed. Kara was on him aggressively punching him to the face and midsection until he collapsed in the snow bloody and beaten.

"Fight!" Kara shouted at him.

Superman just turned away. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Kara yelled at him.

"I'm the reason they're here, alright! I unintentionally activated the beacon that led them here. And now Lois is dead because of me," Superman said mournfully.

"Hey, shit happens. I've made mistakes too. I can't think of any at the moment, but I'm sure I have," Kara said reflectively.

Kara reached out her hand to him. "Let's get your powers back and get you back in this fight."

Superman shook his head and turned away. "I'm going to remember you for the man you once were, not this shell of a man before me," Kara said giving up on him. She looked to the sky and flew off.

* * *

Superman approached the fortress and turned on a hologram of Jor-El, his father, for guidance. "What should I do?" Superman asked him.

"My son, you have done so much for this world. As she increases, you must decrease. She can handle this crisis on her own," Jor-El told him.

"I sensed her strength," Superman agreed.

"She has the knowledge and strength of our world. There is nothing left for you to teach her nor is there anything for me to teach you," Jor-El said to him.

"I understand now," Superman nodded and then activated the self-destruct program.

"Goodbye, my son," Jor-El said as he vanished.

Superman walked out of the fortress as it exploded and collapsed into nothing. He then walked out onto the icy plains and vanished in the blizzard.

* * *

Lucy watched a map of Kryptonian attacks across India. "What's our plan?" Alex asked impatently.

"Our plan is to wait them out a little longer. They're doing our job for us. See how they're destroying our competition: India, China, Iran, and hopefully Russia," Lucy said looking at the map.

"They will eventually attack us," Alex said obviously.

"We need not concern ourselves with that until they attack a NATO country," Lucy said dismissively.

"We have Kryptonite. I say we start distributing it to rest of the world, so they can fight back," Alex said fiercely.

"Distribute our Kryptonite to foreign nations that oppose us? You must be joking. After World War II, America became the undisputed military and economic superpower as Europe and Asia lay in ruins. The same thing can happen again. Best we take advantage of it," Lucy said.

"Prepare the Kryptonite to be transported," Alex ordered her men.

"That sounds like insubordination, Agent Danvers," Lucy glared.

"Send this bitch to a detention cell," Alex ordered her men.

Her men eagerly complied taking her away. "You'll hear from my father about this. You fucked with the wrong woman. I am a JAG officer. You are so fucked!" Lucy shouted as she was taken away.

* * *

Lena's private jet approached the world engine. "You ready?" Lena asked them.

"No," Winn said lamely.

"He's got this," James said confidently.

Alex monitored their flight path. "Your escort should arrive shortly. Good luck."

Chinese fighters came in to assist distracting the world engine while Lena's plane got closer. The spider arms of the world engine blocked the Chinese missiles and reached out swatting a few of their fighters into the ocean. Lena piloted the plane down towards the world engine. "It's now or never," she said.

James opened the door and the three jumped out with parachutes towards the world engine. The world engine hit Lena's plane blasting it to pieces on impact. The three of them managed to land on top of the world engine as Chinese fighters continued to distract it. Finding a hatch, they went inside and sneaked around. Finding a computer console, Winn went to work to hack into the system.

"The world engine is no longer emitting a signal," an agent informed Alex.

"Good job, Winn," Alex said pleased.

The Kryptonians quickly surrounded the three of them forcing them to surrender. Faora glared at Winn. "You will restore the signal or I will give you a most torturous death."

"Don't do it, Winn," James told him.

"Think of the planet," Lena reminded him.

"Let all of us go, and I'll do it," Winn said to Faora.

"Agreed," Faora allowed.

"Winn, you piece of shit," Lena scolded.

"I knew you would pussy out," James said angrily.

"Stop yelling at me!" Winn shouted.

At the DEO, an analyst reported to Alex. "The signal is back on."

"Well...shit," she realized.

* * *

Kara flew quickly towards the world engine. "Bogie approaching at fast velocity," Jax reported to Zod.

"It's her," Zod realized.

The world engine spider arms went after Kara as she approached. Kara fired heat vision at the spider arms incinerating the entire chain in one shot. Kara then sliced off one of the world engine's legs causing it to collapse in the water. In the chaos, Lena, James, and Winn escaped the damaged world engine and ran off onto an island.

Kara landed on the island and gave Lena, James, and Winn an odd look. Zod, Faora, and a dozen Kryptonians exited the ruined world engine with pissed-off faces. "You will give me Kal-El's location and then I will kill you with the cruelest stroke," Zod said to her.

"No," Kara said stubbornly.

"Yes," Zod replied insanely.

Zod sped over to Kara and clutched her by the neck strangling her. Kara kneed him hard to the groin and backed away. Kara and Zod fired heat vision at the same time. The beams lit up the trees on the island. Zod then fired a white beam at Kara keeping her perfectly still. "You have spunk. The spirit of the House of El lives in you, I see. And that is why you must die, Kara Zor-El."

"Now, Faora. Where I saw conflict, I now see resolve. Where there was weakness, I now sense strength. Correct your earlier mistake and fulfill your destiny," Zod ordered her.

"I know what I have to do," Faora said to Kara stepping closer to her.

"You think you can turn her, pathetic child. She is a Kryptonian officer. I cannot be betrayed. I cannot be beaten. I know her mind. I know her every intent. I see this whole world kneeling before Zod!" he said enthusiastically.

Faora suddenly took a knee before Kara. "Forgive me. Please spare my life," she said.

"What the fuck?" Zod wondered.

Kara easily broke free of Zod's hold and sliced him in half with her heat vision at the midsection. The other Kryptonians immediately attacked Kara. What followed was a massacre as Kara took them all on breaking bones, scrambling organs, and punching holes in their bodies. None of their punches had any effect on her. Kara used heat vision and frost breath on them burning and shatter them. Within a minute, their bodies were scattered about on the sandy beach.

"Damn," James said upon witnessing what had happened.

Kara then turned to Faora who was still kneeling. "You killed Lois Lane, you threatened this world, and you led an insurrection on Krypton. For this, I should destroy you completely and utterly. But...in the end, you asked for my forgiveness and respected my power. If you promise to live a peaceful life, you can live on this world," Kara said to her.

"Thank you," Faora said gratefully.

"But we have to do something about that hair. You're going to need to go shopping for some new clothes too," Kara said shaking her head dismayed.

"As you wish," Faora said standing up.

"I understand you haven't been laid in the last thirty-odd years. Let's fix that too. There's plenty of available Indian men over there," Kara said pointing in the direction of them.

"I'm not into males," Faora rejected.

"Oh, no problem. My sister is the same way. I bet you two would have lots in common," Kara said taking Faora away.

"This is fucking ridiculous. I think I hate her now," Lena said bitterly.

"I'll say," James agreed.

"Can we get some shade? I don't want to get skin cancer," Winn said anxiously.

* * *

A recovered Hank exited the DEO clinic and took over from Alex. "Good work, everyone," he said, proud of everyone.

"I think I did almost all the work," Kara annoyed.

"You also could have stopped them from the very beginning without needing a detour to collect Superman," Hank scolded her. "You took a risk sacking Lucy, but you better not think you can pull that shit on me," he said to Alex.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Alex rolled her eyes.

"Hey, Alex, we have a new sister now," Kara said smiling.

"Wait...what?" Alex wondered.

* * *

At L Corp, Lena directed her workers to move samples to various locations. Under a tarp on a medical table was the body of Zod and in a glass case was a glowing green Kryptonite rock. "It's clear we can't trust the DEO to put American interests first. Can we trust you?" Gen. Lane asked her.

"You can always trust a Luthor," Lena assured him.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** If you like this parody story and want more like it, feel free to check out my profile page and check out Adventures of Supergirl, Midvale, Krypton, and Supergirl Returns.


End file.
